- I just can’t with Dostoyevsky today. It’s a lecture when I need something that moves me deeply within. *** I listened to Of Joy and Sorrow today for the first time in maybe ten years. Still trying to figure out why it was gifted to me. Simple kindness? A peace offering? A message? Insight? Now I keep listening to Mitski’s “Best American Girl” and Phoebe Bridger’s “Kyoto” on repeat. *** Yesterday wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. I was exhausted enough at the end of the day to actually sleep well for the first time in a week. The pain is bad today and I am restless. I want to be anywhere but sitting here in my chair, hurting, unable to escape my own thoughts. Sometimes I feel like I’m having an emotional affair with the past. 4:26 p.m. - 2020-11-27 |
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